Culture!

I’ve been busy all weekend with rehearsals and preparations for our symphony concert tonight. I had every intention of taking my camera to take some pictures, but didn’t realize I’d forgotten it until I got there. Damn! Hopefully the next concert…

As far as concerts go, this one was not my favorite. Mind you, I’m not saying it was a bad concert! It’s just that every once in awhile, certain concerts favor different aspects of the orchestra. And that’s fine. This particular concert just wasn’t spectacular for the trombones. It was heavy on the vocals, however. The Chorale sang a couple of haunting, contemporary sacred pieces. Very listenable, however. Then the orchestra joined the singers for a couple of Mozart sacred pieces. All in all, a very good concert. Just not one of my favorites.

Perhaps the best part of the concert was the fact that I wasn’t home to watch the Oscars. I am so tired of award shows! They’re so meaningless anymore. And fairly phony. But I’ll bet that I would have ended up watching it if I wasn’t busy playing my horn!

Book Tag

I hate these things. Good thing I had this book, rather than some dime store romance nearby!

Book Game

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your blog along with these instructions.
5. Don’t you dare dig for that “cool” or “intellectual” book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.

Its upper range is weak and it is much better to use the flutes in that register. Slow, lyric melodies in the lowest twelfth of its range are charcteristic of the instrument. The alto flute is also useful as the bass for a harmony in the flutes.

Okay, tag…you’re it!

Criminal Behavior

There’s very little in life that gets me riled up anymore. I attribute ignorance, self-righteousness and stupidity, as well as alot of other things, to basic human nature. I generally just shake my head in disbelief, happy in the thought that I’m above all that. Fortunately, most people I know don’t let the stupid things that other do/say bother them much. (Though I can’t stand ignorance. The type where you just want to slap some sense into their heads. Not the ignorance that comes from lack of knowledge, but ignorance like calling the purple Tele-Tubby gay, or not knowing how to deal with a 4-way stop.).

Then I run across something like this. The Kansas attorney general wants the medical records of about 90 women and girls who had late-term abortions, saying he needs the materials to investigate crimes. Are you kidding me??? Just look at the picture of him–looks like someone shoved a stick up his ass. Or maybe just his head.

I was raised Catholic, and would still consider myself one, but I’ve also been a high school teacher who has seen plenty of students (girls and boys) suffer through the agonies of having, or not having, an abortion. And to anyone who thinks that teens are going to give up sex, see my rant about ignorance in the first paragraph! In my typical, apolitical way, I don’t have a firm stance on this issue, and thank God that I’ve never personally had to deal with this among anyone close to me. But I know that what this guy is trying to do, and has been doing in secret since October, totally undermines the civil rights of all involved. Regardless of which side of the abortion issue you stand on, how can you justify what this guy is trying to do? He happens to be “a staunch opponent of abortion”, which makes his motives suspect, at best.

I’m sure there are some of you out there who are much more eloquent than me, but am I wrong? Just though I’d share this because, for some reason, it struck a nerve. And that’s not normal for me.

Blood Results

The numbers are in! All of you medically inclined people can interpret them to your heart’s content! The first number will be my results, then the desirable results, then underneath, my numbers from a year ago.

• Total Cholesterol
  199 mg/dl (less than 200)
  184 mg/dl

• LDL Cholesterol (“bad” cholesterol)
  122 mg/dl (less than 130)
  121 mg/dl

• HDL Cholesterol (“good” cholesterol)
  53 mg/dl (45 or more)
  46 mg/dl

• Risk Ratio (Total/HDL)
  3.8 (less than 4.0)
  4.0

• Triglycerides
  120 mg/dl (less than 150)
  83 mg/dl

• Glucose
  99 mg/dl (less than 110)
  92 mg/dl

So in spite of my overweightness and piss-poor diet, I’m not doing too bad. I’m not going to give you specifics about weight, BMI or girth, because those numbers are big numbers. But dammit, my blood’s good!

Now I have to call my sister–we’ve got a bet going on our total cholesterol numbers. The one with the higher number (bad) pays the winner a buck per point. I’m guessing that I’ll be eating at Howard’s Pizza tonight!!!

Potty Musings

WARNING!
THIS POST IS NOT A PRETTY ONE!
I wasn’t going to write this, but the more I thought about it, the more it became clear that I had to. I was up about 4 times last night to go to the bathroom. Not to pee mind you. My stomach was not happy with me last night. Not sure what it was that I ate, but it didn’t agree with me. I’ll spare you the details, but I will tell you that I had to drink alot of water this morning to rehydrate. But that’s not what this is about.

This is about my upstairs neighbors. They manage the apartment complex that I live in. Their floor plan is the same as mine–their kitchen is above my kitchen, their living room is above my living room, etc. They don’t blow a gasket when I’m late with my rent. They’re friendly. Very nice people. What I can’t figure out is what they do at night.

When I’ve come home really late from gigs, their lights are on. At all hours of the night. They’re fairly quiet, but occassionally you can hear them moving from room to room. At all hours of the night. But it’s not bad at all. What I truly hate is that when I’m in the bathroom, there’s almost always one of them in their bathroom. And for as quiet as they may be anywhere else, you can hear every little sound from there. You can hear her splashing in the bathtub. You can hear him when he takes a shower. Needless to say, you can hear every time they use the toilet. And it ain’t a pretty sound. It’s bad enough to hear him peeing directly into the bowl, but you get to hear those final pulses to make sure that everything is drained. And I can’t help but visualize. If he were a good-looking man, I might not mind that, but he’s not, and I’ve probably said more than I should have….

Have you ever thought about the acoustic properties of a toilet bowl? Between the bowl shape and the porcelain, the resonating qualities are unbeatable. Now imagine either one of them sitting down and doing their business, complete with grunts and farts. Or worse. I don’t particularly like the sounds of that when I’m the one doing it, let alone getting an image of either one of them spouting their own toilet symphony.

So last night I made numerous trips to the can. They weren’t pleasant trips, either. They were the types where you thanked God for watching over you and keeping you from tripping over your dirty laundry as you race to get to the toilet in time. And damned if someone upstairs wasn’t there too. Do they have some sort of motion sensor connected to be sure that if I’m taking care of business, THEY’RE doing the same thing? At 3 in the morning??? Well, as I was sitting there praying that my own noisy activities would be over for the night, a happy realization popped in my head–

THANK GOD THE NEIGHBORS DOWNSTAIRS WEREN’T HOME!

Happy President’s Day!

Today is President’s Day. That wonderful day when kids, dressed up as their favorite president, look for their shadows, knock on stranger’s doors, search for hidden gifts, and bring them home to pile under the President’s Tree. Then at night, after their dinner of corned beef and cabbage, they exchange their pink and lacy President’s Day cards to each other, then head outside to shoot off some fireworks. The evening ends with everybody hugging and kissing at midnight, and singing “Auld Lang Syne”. Ah, the memories!

Of course, there are those who won’t celebrate President’s Day. Won’t take the time to remember all that Pres. John Tyler did for his country (including fathering 15 children!). Won’t care that Pres. Chester Arthur remodeled the interior of the White House to the grand stature it enjoys now. These people will still go to work or to school or whatever they do just as though today was like any other day. Or even worse, accept the three-day weekend without reflecting for a moment as to why they’ve got it! Missing out on the joys of one of the truly meaningful days of the year. Sad.

In spite of the fact that Hallmark doesn’t even acknowledge the holiday (but they do have cards for “Sister’s Day” on Aug. 5th! No “Brother’s Day”, but there IS a “Sister’s Day!!! What’s the world coming to???), I would like to personally wish all my readers a very Happy President’s Day! May it be all that you hoped it would be!

Seconds, anyone?

NASA scientists have determined that the Dec. 26th earthquake that triggered the tsunami disrupted the planet’s rotation and has shaved 2.68 microseconds (millionths of a second) from the length of the day. That means that in one million days (approximately 2,737 years, 311 days at 6:00 PM), we will have lost 2.68 seconds that we’ll never get back.

So that brings up some questions. If I’m not going to be around that late, can I get my seconds back now? Who do I see about that? It’s not like there’s enough hours in the day, let alone seconds! Granted, I’d probably just sleep those seconds away, but isn’t that my choice? And what about the Pearly Gates of Heaven? Won’t St. Peter be checking to see how long I was alive down here? What if I haven’t fulfilled my full allotment of God-given seconds here on earth? It’ll be just like Warren Beatty and his soprano sax, all over again!

Say What?!?

I had my wellness screening this morning. The last time I had this done was almost exactly a year ago. I won’t get the blood numbers for about a week, but I can give you some general things that I found out, and how I compared to last year.

My Body Mass Index (BMI) is almost identical to last year. This is good. Only in the sense that it wasn’t any worse. In other words, I didn’t grow up or out in the past year. I won’t give you an exact number. Let’s just say that I’m nowhere near “ideal”.

My waist-to-hip ratio (waist in inches, divided by hips in inches) calculated out to .93. For men, the “desired” ratio should be

Hungry & Saturated

My sister called this afternoon (two of my three sisters live here). Her company is having a wellness screening tomorrow from the local hospital. This is where they take some blood, measure you, weigh you, see how flexible you are, and check your mental well-being, etc. Not an official physical exam though. Then in a week or so, you get the results to find out how “well” you are. Ultimately, it’s a ploy by the hospital to force you to come in and get further tests, or get involved in various self-help groups.

Back to my sister. She asked if I wanted to be included, so I said yes. What I hadn’t planned on is the 12-14 hr. fast you have to go on beforehand. I’m going in at the crack of dawn, and she didn’t call until late in the afternoon, so I haven’t eaten since noon. You can’t do caffeine either, so it’s been water, water, and more water. Guarantees I’ll be up all night. My kidneys and bladder work “real well”! I’ve known that for years!

I’m always a little nervous about these things. I’m afraid that they’re going to come back and tell me I have some sort of rare disease I think I’d prefer not to know about. I’ve decided that ignorance is a really good thing at times. I already know about my physical health. It’s not great, but I’m not so bad that I’m homebound or anything like that. I am overweight. My blood pressure is higher than it should be. I don’t exercise, eat right, or any of that. Alot of what they base your “wellness” on is how you answer their questionaire ahead of time. I’ve never smoked, so I know that my score on the “smoking” section is going to be pretty good. I rarely wear seat belts around town–I’m going to score low on safety. I’ve been known to drink & drive–you fail that section of “wellness” if you’ve done it even once. If you answer that you sometimes don’t handle stress well, they’ll recommend seeing a counselor. The point being here–I know all this. And they have the audacity to say, “Studies show that the use of seat belts increases your chances of surviving an automobile accident…..” “Because you’ve never smoked, you’ll live to be 100, unless you drink and drive….” Like I’ve never heard any of this before!!! I don’t need someone telling me the incredibly obvious!! This part of the screening is a joke!!!!

So why did I say yes? The blood! My father suffered a couple of heart attacks in the mid-90’s, which was a wake-up call to me and my siblings. (He’s fine now. Currently spending 3 months in Hawaii with Mom. Spending my inheritance.) BUT… we all got blood tests soon after his first one, and in a wonderful competition, we compared our blood results, with $$$ up for grabs. I’m proud to say that I, the pizza-eating, beer-guzzling, “deep-fat fry the Twinkies” overweight bachelor consistently scores about 181 for a cholesteral number. My sisters? Pushing 240! And when you take into account the numbers for the HDLs and LDLs and triglycerides, etc., etc., I’ve won every competition! Drives my sisters nuts. Which, in turn, helps me and my “wellness”. So that’s why I do it. To win cash, to check on my numbers, and to enjoy the domination over my sisters!

Now it’s time for another glass of water and bed.

Mysteries of Online Banking

I hesitated about whether or not I should be posting this, but I have to admit, I can’t wait for your responses!

I rarely go online to see what my checking account balance is. I have a general idea what’s in there, and I’ll go in to check the balance maybe twice a month, just to be sure. Today I checked it and it seemed a little low, so I dug deeper to look at the details. Lo, and behold! For the past three months (as far as the detail went back), I’ve been dinged $29.99 each month (unauthorized!). Further investigation indicates that it’s probably for a membership to some porno site. And I have no idea how long this has been going on!

This means I have to call some toll-free number based somewhere in the midwest to talk to some unsuspecting, pure-as-the-driven-snow customer service rep, and tell her that I’ve never joined a porno site, that I don’t know what porno site is charging me, or how long it’s been happening. You can just bet that there’s some sort of button they push for situations like this. Marking me as a porno hound. A pervert. Assigning me a secret code on my account so that in the future, the next pure-as-the-driven-snow customer service rep can pass me off to Bubba, the pure-as-the-yellow-snow customer service rep who sort of likes these calls.

I have no idea how this site got my debit card number, or any other information. It pisses me off! I wish my own bank could take care of it, but they don’t get to make these sorts of adjustments. So I have to talk to a faceless, uncaring voice on the other end of the line. With her finger on the button.

So there it is. Let the comments begin! I’ll keep you posted on my journeys through all of this….